Grateful for Movement


Growing up, I was pretty active, whether playing sports, running or just being outside. When I was 18/19 I started to get into Crossfit. After my first class, I was hooked. Your body can do so much more than you think, especially when you can get past the mentality of ‘I can’t do it’. (This can be used in any situation, changing the narrative of ‘I can’t do it’, to ‘I can do it’) I did so many amazing things and could push my body in ways I didn’t think was possible, physically and even mentally. (It also helped when you had people cheering you on during a workout. Shout out to CFPA! Miss you guys) I even ran a Half Marathon after my Freshman year of college! But when my health started going down hill, I had to put Crossfit and any kind of workout on hold.

The owners at my gym at the time (during COVID) started to make workouts for us online and send them to us via email. Which was great because they made videos of what people could do at home without any equipment. Crossfit was my whole life, I lived and breathed Crossfit. I was always at the gym after work for a couple of hours after the class to work on certain movements to get better at them. It was my social outlet, it was my anger, anxiety, sad and any other emotional release outlet. Once my health started to decline, I realized my body couldn’t handle working out. I would pass out on my yoga mat, not because the workout was hard, but because I couldn’t do easy physical movements; I couldn’t even do the warm up. My body was slowly failing me and the stress of putting a workout on my body took a huge toll. So I knew I had to stop, doing Crossfit, Yoga, and even walking. I felt that I didn’t even know who I was without Crossfit in my life. But what I did know, was that my health became my number one priority.

A little too low for my squats, but I have always had good mobility.

I took about 6 months off of doing any kind of physical movement other than walking around at work. But during those 6 months on days when I would feel good, I would go up to the little gym at work and try to do a little version of an AMRAP (my favorite Crossfit workout) of a few movements just to get my body moving. And every time I did, my body couldn’t handle it. I would be so incredibly tired, too tired to really make anything to eat, my anxiety would come up in a flash and I would feel depressed. During those six months I really started to understand my body more and realize what was causing certain emotions, feelings and symptoms I would get. Once I realized my anxiety was coming back after working out, I knew I had to stop. The adrenaline was too much for my body to handle.

During the time of my 6 month hiatus of not working out, I really spent all my efforts on prepping meals and just fueling my body with the glucose that it had been craving my whole life. I read Medical Medium books like they were my life savers (because honestly they are). My body needed a break from working out. I knew in my heart that my body would eventually be strong again. When you are healing you need to take time off of working out. Your body can’t handle the stress of working out (all the adrenaline) and trying to detox at the same time.

My first big hike after changing to MM. The t-shirt tells you everything!

Slowly I started to get back into Yoga, (I do Yoga with Adriene because she is awesome). Just doing some of her easy 10-15min yoga sessions to get my body moving just a little. Then I added in walks, easy 1-3 mile walks depending on what I could handle at the time. Getting myself out in nature during my walks definitely gave me life. At the time I was so grateful to be able to move a little with walking and yoga. And my body was grateful for the break I gave it.

Today, I enjoy doing Yoga, walking, and even hiking (well hikes between 3-6 miles). Eventually when I’ve healed my body even more I would like to get back into Crossfit, not at the capacity that I used to, but taking a class every now and then. To me Crossfit wasn’t just the workouts (well they are pretty awesome) it was about the Community, all of the other people struggling with you, cheering you on. They all want to see you do your best and it is just a great community of like-minded people.

Cardigan Mountain

Everyone needs movement in their life. Its good for your physical, emotional and mental health! If you are stuck, stressed or anxious sometimes movement can help change your mood. Even just a quick walk outside can get your blood pumping and can help change your mood! Movement is so powerful, and I am grateful everyday that I can move my body. Your body (and Mind) are much stronger than you realize. I hope you find some kind of movement today!

Much Love,

For those of you that followed my Finger Incident here is an update! It is crazy what three weeks of healing can do:

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